Philadelphia

Ira Glass Was Wrong!

Ira Glass is convincing on many fronts. But does anybody else remember when he gave a big yawn to the cupcake trend in an interview in BUST? (Side note: I can't find a copy of the interview right now--can you? I need to remember those carefree days of early '08.) Moreover, in the interview, Glass claimed that BUST's readers would agree: cupcake trend = over. Well darn it, Mr. Glass, it's a year-and-a-half on, and I still don't agree. Maybe there are too many cupcakes in your Magnolia Bakery, Sex-and-the-City New York, but down here, our cupcake build up has been like good molasses: slow and sweet. Sure, we might finally be reaching our saturation point of cupcake shops, but I am still enjoying them. And the cupcake shop I'm loving the most right now? Buttercream Cupcake truck. The great thing about the truck's treats is they aren't an exercise in excess. Rather, they're normal-sized, with dollops of not overly sweet frosting in the center. The bad news? The truck moves regularly, and it's usually only in a given spot for a couple of hours at a time. Maybe it's just trying to avoid Ira.

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Shopping • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Frogurt in the Fall

Fall is not the time to eat frozen yogurt. And because I have great timing, I'd like to tell you about a place I recommend not eating frozen yogurt at: Sweet Ending. Yet another Pinkberry knock off, Sweet Ending serves up pour-your-own tart frozen yogurt in a clean-yet-cutsey shop near Rittenhouse. The yogurt is meh--not terrible, but not as good as other establishments doing the same thing, like Phileo. Sweet Ending's plain is great, the strawberry fakey, and the green tea wholly unpleasant (if you're ready to call foul, know that this is from someone who is a fan of green-tea frozen treats and knows what this not-for-everyone flavor is supposed to taste like). But here's some great news: not only is fall not the best time for frozen yogurt, winter isn't either, so you have six whole months before you even think about getting accidentally temped by this place.

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Shopping • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Hora Feliz

Happy hour: What's not to love? It's an excuse to get tipsy with friends or co-workers and scope out young professionals in their office best, while enjoying beverages nicely discounted. I am a huge fan of Noche's happy hour, which is a half-hour later than most, from 5:30 to 7:30 (that's pm people!). The atmosphere is laid back, somehow the Christmas lights arent tacky, and the view overlooking the corner of 19th & Chestnut is superb for people watching. Noche features $5 pitchers and $2 pints of classier-than-college beers (my favorite feature being Magic Hat #9 on Wednesdays) in addition to $4 dollar Finlandia drinks. And the best part: Tuesdays through Thursdays it's buy one get one free pizzas! (Or BOGO, as Payless would say). The BBQ Chicken pizza is, hands down, the best I've ever consumed, and the house Noche Pizza is a winner as well. The veggie pizza is a little too ricotta-y for my liking, but my roommates devoured it nonetheless. Nachos are $4 bucks, so you can have 2 pizzas, nachos and 2 pitchers for just over $20 bucks. Not bad. Throw in a jukebox tune or a round of pool and you're in business...whether you're in business attire or not.

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Nightlife • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Penn 1681 Vodka

Nestled just above the Northeast Philadelphia Airport, the Philadelphia Distilling Company may physically be on the edge of the city, but with each new release, they find their way deeper into my heart. (Dear reader, don't tempt me to write a cheesier sentence than that.) First the PDC came out with Bluecoat Gin, that cobalt-bottled beauty, and now it's Penn 1681 Rye Vodka. I don't know about you and yours, but my vodka-sipping friends usually choose Svedka, which, yeah, is good for its cheap price. But look: while Penn 1681 might cost a little bit more than Svedka, it is a hell of a lot smoother and more delicious. Moreover, if you ever yap about buying local, it's time to put your dollars where your drink-hole is: Philadelphia Distilling is ensuring that drinking local in Philly doesn't just mean beer; you can hit the hard stuff too.

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Liquor Stores • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Nachos of the Gods

I'm going to be bold and say something that so many people in this city, from politicians to PECO workers, do not have the balls to say: I am going to name what might be the best nachos in Philadelphia. It's a dangerous move on my part; we all know that the powerful nacho lobby might very well hunt me down for this. But, here goes: the best nachos I've had to date in Philadelphia were at Jose Pistola's. They were served on flour-tortilla chips, not corn, and had a nice balance of toppings. But, dear reader, I must warn you: do not get lulled into a false sense of comfort by these nachos! Although Jose Pistola's has a wonderful draught beer list to couple with the beautiful nachos, the bar is also filled with BOOBY TRAPS. For example: the guacamole is mediocre. Every taco I've tried has been mediocre. Look: I can only assume that these traps were set by the nacho lobby. But do not let this deter you! Venture boldly to Jose Pistolas, step over the laser-lines that crisscross the floor, and order the nachos and beer.

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Restaurants • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Philly Beer Geek Competition

So, you like beer. Congratulations, hop-lover. But do you really like beer? Do you like beer enough to know your ale from your pilsner? Can you spot the differences between stouts? Then you might have the stuff to become the 2009 Philly Beer Geek. The competition starts Monday night at Tria, where wannabe geeks will have to blind-taste six thirst-quenching-good Philly beers and identify the styles. But don't think that you win that and you win it all--there are two more rounds of delicious, delicious beer (one on March 5, one on March 12) until you can get crowned and enjoy "$1000 in beer-related prizes" (hopefully it's not just $1000 worth of cozies and openers). Tickets for the qualifying round are available on Tria's website, and you better snatch one up now if you want the ultimate chance to declare your geekiness and love of alcohol at the same time.

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Schools • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Rich People's Business Food Court

This sushi. Looks normal, right? Sure. But I tell you now, it is not. No, it came from the Rich People's Business Food Court. The Rich People's Business Food Court ("The Market at Comcast Center" if you want to be technical) is in the basement of the Comcast Center, and the first time I went there, I saw a man in a gray suit sitting alone EATING A LOBSTER. AT LUNCHTIME. Lunch lobster. Lunchobster. Anyway, what I am trying to say is that you do not know food court until you know rich people's food court, with DiBruno's fancy cheeses, a farmer's market, and brick-oven pizzas. Of course, a lot of the food is silly expensive, but it's also hilarious. And, dammit, I have to say it again: lunchobster.

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Landmarks • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Good Music, Bad Crowd

If drunk girls swaying on bar stools and spilled beer on the floor is your idea of a good time, then by all means, check out Fado. Or, should I say, "Fadon't." Actually, this Irish Pub is an excellent pick on any weeknight. But during the weekend, it turns into an over-crowded frat party for people of all ages. Normally, I don't mind this because the music is fabulous. You can definitely get your groove on to some Bel Biv Divo, but just be careful that the drunk dude next to you doesn't spill his beer all over your sleeve--or vice versa. That is, if you are ever able to snag a beer from one of the two bartenders as you muddle your way through a crowd. So avoid the chaos at Fado on the weekends. You'd probably have better luck at the shady bar across the street.

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Nightlife , Restaurants • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Steps (to Life)

Who was the architectural genius behind City Hall's subway system? Sure, it's cool that you can walk underground for ten blocks and breath in the fresh smell of homeless urine on snowy winter days, but whoever designed the steps leading to the subway platforms missed the mark. In case you haven't noticed, Philadelphians are not generally slender and dainty folk. Not that it would matter. Even the skinniest of girls has to shimmy up the steps past the people breathlessly charging downward in an effort to catch the train. Add to that the inordinate amount of baggage people seem to haul to and from work on a daily basis (purses, lunch bags, gym bags, shopping bags, laptop bags), and you'll find yourself wedged mid-step between the rail and a stranger every day. If we were a polite town, maybe we'd get out of the way and let the people rushing to make the train down the steps first. But since that's unlikely, make sure to pack some Purell and keep to the right.

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Landmarks • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Christmas Village

This year, more people are saying "Po' po' po'" than "Ho ho ho." The economy might be in the shitter, but that doesn't mean visions of a jolly holiday can't dance in your head. Philadelphia's holiday celebration is more festive than ever, with City Hall's newly erected Christmas Village. Vendors hock their wares at this outdoor market, which will help you get into the holiday spirit much faster than, say, the Gallery mall. Bundle up on a chilly winter day and enjoy live Christmas music while you browse tons of holiday-themed gifts, like ornaments, nutcrackers, and nesting dolls. Or sip some hot chocolate and dig into a potato pancake while you check out handmade jewelry and gourmet dog treats. You can even take the kids, or your pet, to see Santa. The goods are crafty and while you probably won't check everything off your holiday shopping list, Christmas Village--open every day until Christmas--will get you thinking about stuffing some stockings rather than selling some stocks.

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Landmarks • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Hypnotherapy

We've all got habits that we want to break. And some of us have more bad habits than others. Your straight edge friends probably think all it takes to put down that pack of cigarettes is willpower. But what do they know about the sweet seduction of nicotine? And how many times can you tell someone who's looking to lose weight to put the fork down? It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that a second helping of tiramisu isn't gonna get anybody in shape for bikini season. But we're human... and saying 'no' is something we suck at, whether saying it to others or ourselves. So if you're looking to drop a few pounds or stop gnawing your finger nails, maybe you should give Sernekos Hypnosis a shot. Loretta interviews her patients and gets to the heart of what drives your indulgence. Her soothing method of hypnotism helps you visualize what you want to achieve. Believe it or not, the power of repetitive, positive thinking can help you dump your bad habits. And Loretta is reputable, so you won't be left quacking like a duck every time someone mentions the word 'scallywag.'

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Services • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

All Italia

Over 100 years of tradition packed into a little section of 9th street; the Italian Market really needs no introduction. No bells and whistles; I give you the facts: Di Bruno Bros. Cheese, with cheese wheels the size of a large toddler; Sarcone's Deli, the most sought-after bread in the city; fresh meats-hanging-from-the-ceiling at Esposito's; Isgro Pateries, with wafting, sweet smelling scents that seduce market patrons for blocks; and Anthony's Italian Coffee House specializing in eye-opening espresso. The market is, hands down, the best reason to pull yourself out of bed on a Saturday or Sunday morning.

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Landmarks • Bella Vista / Queen Village

A Nettled Public

Philly is known for its rabid, and sometimes ornery, sports fans. Everyone has heard about the time Eagles fans threw snowballs at Santa Claus. And that's just a G-rated example of our fans' antics. On game days, Philadelphia sports bars are crawling with fans. Just head to any venue with a TV and you'll find booze-fueled natives to bump fists with and high five during big plays. One of the newest sports bars to hit the market, JL Sullivan's Speakeasy is a swanky underground sports bar with posh leather booths and flat-screens galore. The bar is one of only a handful in the city selling Red Bull's new cola, so get your caffeine on and stay up all night celebrating the big win. One word of caution: On days when Philly teams aren't playing, a sparse handful of people rooting for other teams can be found perched at the bar. One guy, cheering for the Chicago Bears, actually apologized for being loud. So make sure you go when the Phillies, Eagles, Flyers, or Sixers are playing. And cause as much of a ruckus as you want. It is a sports bar, after all.

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Nightlife , Restaurants • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Stupid Drinks on Stupid Beds

Vango. A wannabe high-class bar where the drinks are over-priced and the bartenders look like they stole their outfits from a strip club on Delaware Ave. However, don't let that deter you from enjoying the view from Vango's amazing roof-deck, or in more posh terms, "skybar." One would think that perhaps the most stunning view of Philly's skyline could only be viewable by V.I.P. types, as an Oscar-like red carpet guides you upstairs. Well, that's only if you get passed the hulky bouncer, who looks like Ruben Studdard--only meaner. Alas, once at the skybar you can sip your just-average mojito on one of the many beds that surround the deck. Or maybe you want to do other things on the beds. Whatever your mood, lie down and be sure to catch a glimpse of Philly's finest skyscrapers, all lit up and looking fancy. Just don't let the bed bugs bite.

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Nightlife • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Don't Read This

I really, truly don't want to spill the beans. No, I really don't want to tell you about the 24(?) ounce beers for three dollars. Or the ashtrays that get more butt than the Jonas Brothers, even after this bullshit "Smoke Free Philly" nonsense. You don't need to hear about the great selection from the classic jukebox, or the fact that the entire bar will sing along if you choose the right song. I can't tell you how many glasses are smashed on the floor each night, and how much the crowd gets riled up in the glass menagerie. I'll keep mum about the huge long island iced teas that, for 9 dollars, will make you slip off your barstool. If I tell you, you'll go. And if you go, it won't be the cool ass, tight knit bar my friends and I know and love. If you go, maybe Oscar's will turn trendy; maybe they will up their prices and clean the bathrooms and start carding at the door. But if you read this review and find anything I just wrote even remotely enticing, I guess I can count you out of the yups around Center City; shit, maybe we could even get a beer sometime.

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Nightlife • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Slavs and their Bathing

This is truly a family business composed of three generations of Russian women. The place is decorated with beauty magazine articles highlighting the expertise of the salon. Apparently this is THE place to get your nethers waxed. Luckily for the men, they can attend to your Sasquatch issues. When you walk in, don't expect an acknowledgement of your presence, as apparently the fame has gone to these ladies' heads. When your time comes, you will be summoned to the back room to choose your torture. Discretion is not in their vocabulary and the telltale walls will reveal how hirsute your pubis is to everyone in the waiting room. Supposedly you can pay via credit card, but if the Mother Hen hasn't taken her Celebrex she will demand cash. Even when you tip, don't expect a "thank you" or "come again soon," because everyone has already gone back to watching As the World Turns, not caring if the door hits you on your now sore behind. I kick myself because in four weeks I will inevitably be back; the babushkas are that good.

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Shopping • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Cool. No Coffee.

All the art kids know about it, and so shall you! Jean's Cafe lives perilously close to the intersection of Broad and Walnut, just a stone's throw from the art institute. Many students visit for the cheap deli, where you can get any combination between oatmeal, Reuben on rye or the Tarzan (a gigantic veggie sandwich). A decent lunch shouldn't set you back more than $7, but I usually get away with something for a few bucks less. Don't be fooled by the fact that it's named a "cafe." This place is a deli and scant-seating restaurant, and a great one at those, but you won't be able to sate your craving for a vanilla latte here.

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Restaurants • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Ah, Paris!/Philadelphia!

Head to Parc, Steven Starr's new French bistro, and the instant you walk in the front door, you'll scratch your head and try to figure out how you landed in Europe sans the six-hour plane ride. Beautiful tile floors and quaint tables decorate this spacious Rittenhouse Square restaurant. The ambiance is so accurately French, in fact, that upon sitting at your table for a few minutes, you'll find yourself loathing all the stupid Americans around you. Filled to the brim with Rittenhouse natives, Parc is where the wealthy go to be seen and cast bitchy attitude. Maybe, like me, you'll sit next to a woman who applauds and sarcastically screeches "Yay!" when her food is served. Sure, the service was a little slow, but let's assume that there are still some kinks to iron out in the kitchen since the place is less than a week old. Or maybe the slow service adds to the authentic European atmosphere... The food is yummy--hello, lobster cocktail!--but with steep prices, Park is definitely a spot to save for a special occasion. Like celebrating the fact that you don't live in Rittenhouse and don't have to deal with socialites on a constant basis.

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Restaurants • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Loud and Delicious

I've had fluid stuck in my ears since last November when a cold made my sinuses drain wrong. In day-to-day conversation this isn’t much of a problem, but I do have a harder-than-usual time hearing in the following situations: 1) when I'm in loud places and 2) when I've been drinking. This is why I find it hard to give wine-and-cheese bar Tria a completely glowing recommendation. The place was super-cute, but even before I had a drink, it was hard to hear my friend across the two-person table. The cheeses we got were delicious, and the wine--a Sauvignon Blanc from their "Zippy Whites"--was one of the most completely pleasing wines I've had in a while. But when my friend asked if I wanted to order actual food there, I said no. Well, actually, the first thing I said was "Huh?" since I couldn't hear him I'd go back to Tria, I definitely would. But I just might have to wait 'til my ears drain first.

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Nightlife , Restaurants • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle

Thread

You get what you pay for. So when you rush into that generic nail salon for a $7 eyebrow waxing, be prepared to look permanently surprised for the next few weeks while your eyebrows grow back in. Then head to Thread Beauty Bar on Chestnut. In Thread's comfy minimalist loft, technicians use a technique called threading (duh!) to de-fuzz your face. The method is incredibly precise and not as painful as waxing. So now all you brow-obsessed can finally achieve that perfect arch--usually only seen on the likes of movie stars. And because there's no wax, you won't feel sticky, like you face-planted into some sap-filled tree, for the rest of the day. The price is cheaper than most Center City spas and salons and they have a ton of other services, including manicures and pedicures. Not to mention, every seventh service is free! Wednesday nights, Thread is open a little later for Martini and Manicure Night. Ladies, what better way can you think of to catch up on all the hot gossip?

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Services • Rittenhouse / Logan Circle